Sometimes I just miss you..

 

January 31, 2011

The saddest part of this whole ordeal is that I care enough to cry.. and you don't care at all. 

When you see how much you've hurt someone, does it make it easier to walk away and deal with your hurt? or do you just want to rush up to them and throw your arms around their neck and hug back all the hurt and pain you've both been caused by whatever ordeal you've gone through? When you spend years being a best friend to someone you've been told all along is just using you for when his girlfriend can't talk, does it make it easier to say good-bye? Does it make it easier to gradually fall away, or to have a huge confrontation and fight it all out? 

I wish you had noticed when I wanted to talk to you, I wish you hadn't made me cry just now, I wish I didn't need cheering up, I wish you were smarter to know that she is not the only person in your life, I wish you knew I care for you more than she does, I wish I didn't care for you, I wish I didn't miss you as desperately as I do. 

I'm a little broken hearted this evening, but never fear, life goes on and you make more life long friends, right? I'm not sure if any of this made sense, but I needed to vent it out I suppose. I literally spent all day thinking about my used to be best friend and that is a time that I can never recover. I love you, Tallon Chappel, I just wish you knew what you were saying good-bye to. I'll miss you. 

Goodnight, World, things always look better in the morning.